Chapter Forty: Doing One’s Best

Listening to the mocking remarks of the charming saleswoman, I could only blush in embarrassment, unable to retort. To be honest, I now live at the very bottom of society. Faced with all kinds of people and situations, it’s impossible to expect humility from everyone or for everything to go my way. Today, it’s sarcasm; tomorrow, someone else might resort to violence. What’s the root cause of all these humiliations? Isn’t it simply a lack of ability and strength? But who can I blame for that? It’s my own failing.

With a bitter smile, I turned to leave. Just as I twisted around, I saw Zhao Ke Wen squeeze towards me, her face brimming with excitement.

“What’s wrong, little brother? So many phones, and not a single one caught your eye?” Zhao Ke Wen looked at me in confusion as I lowered my head in silence, then glanced at the display behind me.

Faced with her question, I felt there was no need to keep up the pretense. If I kept pretending, I’d only make a fool of myself.

“It's not that I haven't found one I like, sister. I just don’t have that much money.” I raised my head with a self-deprecating smile, meeting her gaze and speaking the truth.

She looked into my eyes, her white teeth biting her lip gently. “I never said you had to buy one. I just told you to pick; you only need to choose what you like.”

I understood her meaning—she’d pay if I chose. But I really couldn’t bring myself to do it. If being honest was humiliating, depending on others for vanity was even worse.

I shook my head, intent on leaving, but Zhao Ke Wen grabbed my hand, refusing to let me go. She dragged me back to the counter, whether I wanted to or not.

“Pack up all the phones in this row,” she said to the saleswoman.

“What?” The saleswoman seemed not to understand.

“I said, I want all these phones from the display. Pack them up, quickly!” Zhao Ke Wen’s tone was sharp, almost as if she was arguing with me.

The saleswoman stood there dumbfounded, unmoving, as if she thought Zhao Ke Wen was joking.

Seeing her stand silently, Zhao Ke Wen frowned.

I hurried to say, “Sister, I was wrong. I’ll choose, okay?”

“You aren’t wrong!”

“No, really, I was wrong. I like… this one!” I pointed at random in the display case. I didn’t care about brands; I’d used off-brand phones for years and managed just fine. The rest of my money could pay next month’s rent.

“Alright, then this one. See? Wouldn’t it have been easier if you’d done this from the start? Why are men so proud and stubborn?” Zhao Ke Wen rolled her eyes at me, her anger melting into a smile.

“This phone’s original price is four thousand seven hundred. Today’s promotion brings it down to four thousand two hundred,” the saleswoman said to Zhao Ke Wen, flashing a perfect smile—so different from the way she’d spoken to me. Clearly, in this business, you need not only eloquence but also the ability to read people.

“Can I pay by card?” Zhao Ke Wen took a bank card from her purse and handed it over.

“Yes, you can.”

Holding this phone—which was already a luxury for me—I felt a heaviness inside. A sorrow and shame I couldn’t put into words lingered in my mind. I couldn’t keep living in my own little world. I needed to find a way to earn money, to climb upward, so that when I went out, people wouldn’t look at me with contempt.

“What’s wrong?” Zhao Ke Wen asked.

“Nothing…” I couldn’t blame her. Men and women have different values. Perhaps, in her eyes, what she did was perfectly normal; she’d never know that her actions made me feel sad and awkward.

“Oh, shall we go get your SIM card replaced?”

“Yes.”

On the way, Zhao Ke Wen kept pouring out tips and strategies on how to pursue girls—from reading their moods to dressing well—her advice was so meticulous it left my head spinning by the time we reached the telecom office. I nodded and agreed, but inside, I thought her advice was nothing more than tricks for picking up girls in bars, not for actually falling in love.

Inside the office, Zhao Ke Wen glanced around and suddenly said, “There’s a promotion for new numbers here. Why don’t you get a new SIM card?”

“No, sister. I’ve used this number for years. I’ve already lost contact with so many acquaintances. If I change numbers, I’ll have to rely on fate to meet them again in the future.” I explained.

“You’re right…” Zhao Ke Wen wandered about, but soon, bored, she sat on a bench and played on her phone.

Replacing the SIM card was quick and smooth. I put it into the phone, called Zhao Ke Wen to test it, then left the office.

I checked the time on my phone—it was almost noon. I asked Zhao Ke Wen what she wanted to eat. She gave me a meaningful look and replied, “Cold noodles.”

We went to a nearby cold noodle restaurant and sat by the window, just as we did last time. With the scorching weather outside, it made the cold noodles seem all the more appealing.

“Brother, I want to open my own bar,” Zhao Ke Wen said after a moment’s silence.

I stared at her in shock. Open a bar? In this city of dazzling nightlife, running a bar, a KTV, or a dance hall meant taking on enormous risks. The number of entertainment venues here was already overwhelming.

“Is there a problem?” Zhao Ke Wen asked, puzzled by my reaction.

“Not exactly a problem, but opening a bar requires a huge upfront investment. And the future business is hard to predict. There’s fierce competition and not enough innovation—these are challenges you’ll have to face.” I shared my concerns.

“Funding isn’t an issue… As for competitors, we just have to do better than them, right?”

“Sister, don’t be so naïve… Let me give you an example. I used to sing at Fenghua Bar. Their theme and concept were set at very high and mainstream standards, but facing big players like Longxing and Beauty Bar, it was still hard to grow.”

“It doesn’t matter. We have to believe in ourselves, don’t we?” Zhao Ke Wen seemed unmoved by my words.

“Sister, please think twice before you jump in!” I knew the money was hers, and I couldn’t stop her, but I truly didn’t want to see her walk into a fire pit with her eyes wide open.

“Brother, help me with the bar in the future. You’ve spent more time in bars—you should know more than I do… I’ll hire professionals for management and operations; you just take care of creative planning. What do you think?” Zhao Ke Wen looked at me seriously.

“I’ve never formally studied any of this. I doubt I could manage.” I was just a singer in bars, and now she wanted me to switch to creative planning—wasn’t that a joke? Sister, you have money, but don’t make me help you lose it…

“Help me, please. It’s one of my wishes—for dream, freedom, and a new beginning. Will you?” Zhao Ke Wen leaned forward, her tone sincere. “Prove your worth in this new way, won’t you?”

“I… I…” The opportunity Zhao Ke Wen offered was enormous. If my first plan failed, the bar would lose its initial wave of popularity, and it might never recover. I couldn’t bear such responsibility. She was gambling the bar’s future.

“I have nothing left. Let’s take a chance together. We both need an opportunity to choose a new life, don’t we?” Zhao Ke Wen looked at me, her emotions running high.

“I swear…” Her words moved me. All my humiliation, all my insignificance—I wanted change more than anyone… I gritted my teeth, steeling myself, ready to try, to give it everything I had.